5 Simple Ideas To Refresh Your Marriage

No matter how strong the initial attraction, there may and usually does, come a time when the fairytale ending starts to lose its pink haze. Face it, things go wrong, relationships are a constant work in progress. If you want to keep the shine on the marriage vows, try the following five simple tips.

1. Don't leave the responsibility for the money on one partner's shoulders. Money is one of the biggest causes of arguments and stress in a marriage. Couples disagree and argue about it constantly, often from quite early on in the marriage.

So it could be a good idea, even before you walk down the aisle if possible, to discuss how you will manage your money.

To be honest, it almost doesn't matter what the solution is, as long as you both agree, I mean really agree not just passively give in.

Whatever the decision, both of you should have input about what to do and how to do it; then it should just need changing if and when your circumstances change. Do not sit there and stress because he or she is wasting the money, talk about it!

2. While you are talking about things, remember the three-sentence rule. That means don't nag, ask in three sentences; it is a lot less likely to cause problems. Remember to sell the benefits of him or her doing the thing you want them to do. For example "If you could walk the dog, then I could get the dinner on early, so we could eat in time to watch the football". Or, "if you iron my best shirt for me, then I will look smart when we go to see your parents on Saturday".

Hey and don't forget the word please, but not a sarcastic one.

It is really important not to get into a fight about these things, as they can easily escalate into something which you cannot escape from. So, if the discussion is becoming an argument, it might be time to take a break and come back to it when it is not such a hot-button topic.

3. Do not hold on to bad feelings about your partner. Express it and then forget it. Try writing it down, 'he always leaves his dirty socks on the top of the washing basket, never puts them inside'. Growl about, it mutter about it, until you are sick and tired of thinking about it, then when you have expressed it fully and completely, rip it up symbolically, throw it away and then forget about it. Do not think about it any more. Life really is too short to bear stupid grudges.

4. Don't become complacent. Make sure not to fall into the trap of not making an effort to keep your romance alive; those little touches - a smile, a thank you, can make a huge difference. Just because you are at home does not mean that you don't have to clean your teeth and brush your hair. Complacency is not good for any relationship, so try not to let things slip.

5. Nurture yourself. All good marriages are about give and take, but one person should not do all the giving. You should be good to yourself as well, so remember to allow yourself some 'me' time, it is not selfish, it is important. It will make your relationship stronger, because you do not stop being a whole person.

Follow these five points and you will have a stronger relationship, but if there is a problem, do not be afraid to look for help.

For wise advice and counsel, Jay recommends you try this link to save your marriage
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